A Year in the Life

And Loving... I recently started a new job.  Yes, at my age it can be a little scary, but it's been great.  Before I go forward, a little back story first... ...For the last 4 1/2 years I have been a sub in my children's school system.  (if you are a mom, love kids, and need a great way to make a little spending money, I highly recommend it.)  I loved being a sub!  I was able to be like everyone's favorite aunt.  You know the one I'm talking about.  She the one who comes in and loves you for you.  She helps you get through the have to's so you can have a little fun while your mom's not around. The way a sub enters a classroom is SO important.  You have to be confident, because it's true the children can smell fear, but you also have to be available to the kids:  available to offer an ear, extra help, smiles, a few hugs, and maybe even a little discipline in a life-giving way. We would play 4 corners if everyone finished with thei...

 A friend from grade school was going through old pictures and found a picture of the house I grew up in.  I have wonderful memories from that home.  We played football in the front yard, swam in the pool, built homecoming signs, and watched movies and the 1984 Olympics.  My parents let me invite the entire 8th grade over to swim the day we officially became 9th graders.  That house is filled with laughter.    My parents didn't care about your background.  They didn't care what kind of home you came from.  They wanted you to feel loved and accepted when you came over to our house.  It was a house that love built.  It's funny looking back.  You think that some kids have it all together just to find out they saw themselves as misfits.  I was always the one who felt like I was on the fringe.  Not cool, not as smart as I wanted to be, not a lot of things.  I wonder how many other kids felt & feel like that to...

Time, ugh.  I picked up E's senior pictures today  & then I started looking through pictures trying to find one of Elizabeth when she was little & found a bunch when all of mine were small.  I don't remember them growing so quickly.  I know didn't want them to grow up quite so fast & I think a small part of me has changed my mind.  There is a little piece that misses the crazy schedule and all the teaching moments ahead.  It seems they were all here & now most of them are gone.  It's funny because this is how I still see them, not how they are today.  I'll be ok...maybe the next time I see a screaming toddler, or a child that has projectile vomiting.  It has been a great ride so far & I will appreciate every second I see all my crazy kiddos no matter how old they are. Celebrating Life, ~ashley

The "most dreaded" phrase for all children and teenagers.  There are many who feel this phrase should be not used when talking to children.  They say it's vague and authoritarian.  I had an epiphany this weekend about what 'because I said so' really means & what it should mean to our children when we say it. When parents use 'because I said so' the first thing we want you, our children, to do is to have trust that the decision we have made is in your best interest.  Sometimes we don't have time to sit down and explain every thought that went into our final decision, but we need y'all to understand we have your best interest in our hearts. We need you to know we have years  of life's experiences under our belts.  We understand that in your teenage minds you are already grown-up, but let me assure you, you are not.  Oftentimes we will consult with other adults (some older & some our peers) to get to our decision if we are vacillat...

We wear pink on Wednesdays. Suck.  That's right I said it.  Mean people suck.  I'm fuming right now!  My heart beating like a drum & hands shaking kind of mad.  Mean people, ugh!  I asked my friend if I could tell her story here about her encounter with some mean kids & I have her ok, but I'm changing her name. Jana is 24 weeks pregnant.  Not all of us are blessed with wonderful, glowing, easy pregnancies.  Some of us are sick and struggle through the 40 weeks of growing another human being inside our bodies.  Jana is one of these lucky few.  Did I mention she is also chasing a 2 year old around?  Talk about compounding your sickness and exhaustion. It's summer in Alabama, and if you live here you know that means hot and humid.  Add in that it's been raining a ton, which we need, but it jacks the humidity close to 100% & makes it feel even hotter.  Being comfortable while also trying to chase said toddl...

Hop's graduation from Auburn this May. First off, I know how weird this is.  I've posted two days in a row after not writing anything for almost a year.  All my coherent thoughts are finally surfacing after all this time. :) How my life has changed in 10 years!  10 years ago I was a crazy and stressed mom of 4 ages 5-12.  Fast forward to today & I'm still crazy, but I'm now a mom of 4 ages 15-22.  I don't know where those 10 years went, but they flew by.  While I was driving children places, teaching kids how to drive, cooking dinner, folding clothes, and monitoring homework, all my little chicks grew up.  I have always loved my children.  Duh, they're mine.  What I've really noticed over the last few years is that I like them, and I tell my children I like them.  At first they said:  "you have to we are your children", but that's an untrue statement.  I have to love them, but not like them.  I heard a mom say sh...

Hello dear readers; long time no write.  I have been writing, just not on here, but that's a different subject for another time. I was scrolling through social media today.  (I hate social media, have I ever said that?)  Well, I do, and when I get on it, I keep asking myself why am I here?  Don't I have laundry to wash/dry/fold & put away, or a dishwasher to unload, or dinner to cook, or toe jam to get up off the floor?!  Apparently not, because I just kept on scrolling.  I'm trying to really limit my time on FB, except for I Mom So Hard, those 2 are hi.lar.i.ous!  Their new one on bathing suits must not be missed. Ok, well that was a little rabbit trail, sorry!  I was looking at several things on Facebook:  1. pictures from my youngest's 8th grade banquet & 2.  a blog posting from another mom.  I'm just going to discuss #1 & have 2 thoughts on the subject. First, the 8th grade dance pictures.  Everyone looke...

I know, long time no post.  I haven't really had anything to say; it's shocking, I know.  I do have something to say today though.  IF you disagree with what I'm saying, ok great for you.  These are things I've just noticed in the last year & I thought I would share it with you.   I sub…a lot, and I love it.  I sub middle and high school aged kids.  They are fun and crazy and make me laugh.  I get to be like their favorite aunt.  I come in, love on kids, help them with their work or give them a test, and then I leave.  Most kids are excited to see me.  They know they get a break from the strictness of their teacher for a day.  My goal is to help the kids learn something new, finish their work with excellence & have fun each time I sub. But, here lately I’ve noticed a disturbing trend among 12-18 year olds, they are utterly dependent on their teachers and parents for everything. It's OK if they fail Hey mom an...

I was accused, and rightly so, of not teaching the children how to cook.  Apparently they didn't learn by watching me cook for hours on end all through their childhood.  Yes, I'll be waiting on my mother of the year trophy and accolades from each of you reading this.  ;)  Well, the not being able to cook stops now for the 4.  Since this may be the very last time I have all four under one roof for the summer everyone is going to learn to cook, even Henry. (who, by the way, turned 14 yesterday!  HBD Hen!) Sunday night we sat around the table eating dinner and we planned out the menu for the week.  Several rules were laid out for the summer of cooking:  You cannot grill out two weeks in a row.  No repeating meals over the weeks.  I will do the grocery shopping, but I have to know what you need.  I'm pretty sure I'll have to throw a few other rules in as we go along, but this was a good place to start. Here's what everyone is cookin...

A letter: Dear sweet high school girl trying out for __________,  (insert your team name here) I wanted to let you know that God really doesn't care if you make said team.  Yes, He gave you the ability to throw a layout full; pull a firebird right after you've done 8 turns in second; have the largest range in the choir; be able to debate the questions until your blue in the face; kick and catch any ball,  but that's not what He cares about.  He doesn't love you more because you've made those teams.  He loves you. Period.  Every little flaw you think you have, He created, and in reality it's not a flaw, only you just think it is.  He thinks you're beautiful and wonderful and His. Have you ever noticed when people make or do something great they always praise God's name and quote scripture?  Have you ever heard anyone praise Him when they didn't get something they've trained years for?  When you've been rejected and told you're no...

Come close children,  please draw near. I have a cautionary tale  you all must hear. Your words and pictures  that you post online, You should assume it will be screen shot and shared many times.  Friends will see and share and talk about what you have done, And it is with one careless act you caused your reputation to drawn through the mud. If pretty is as pretty does, and it's your character that matters. You need to look in the mirror closely because your beauty has been shattered. Be careful then what  you post, because it can ruin you in a blink. Remember these important words, and before you post, just THINK. ~ashley T~Is it True? H~Is it Helpful? I~Is in Inspiring? N~Is it Necessary? K~Is it Kind? ~anonymous "The internet is written in Pen not Pencil.  Think before you post."   ~anonymous I love Roz from Monsters Inc. I'm just SMH.  Do kids ever realize that everyth...

UAB Sigma Kappa 2015 Colonization Class Today was an exciting day.  It was one of those days that you celebrate the joys of youth.  It was the kind of day that old people watch and smile and remember when it was their turn to celebrate and be celebrated. Today my sorority colonized a new chapter.  Sigma Kappa is now part of the sorority experience at the University of Alabama at Birmingham.  I am so excited I can't even stand it. The young women in the room were beautiful, smart, enthusiastic and diverse.  A colonization class is special.  They are the trailblazers.  They will set the tone of the UAB chapter for years to come.  If what I saw today is an indication of this chapter's future...WOW, these young women are going to rock this sorority thing! I was talking with all the alumnae in the room, and the really neat thing is, there was only one from my home chapter.  Alumnae groups are made up of women from all over the United State...

Can I say that I am happy I don't have a senior in high school this year?  I am.  It's emotional and stressful, and goes by way to quickly, and emotional.  I realized all of this when Hop was a freshman in high school. I'm sitting on a somewhat toasty Monday night watching Hop play in a Freshman football game.  No one comes to the freshman football games but the freshman cheerleaders, and parents of the players and cheerleaders.  We were about half way through his season, and it hit me that I only had 3 more years to watch him...do just about anything.  I voiced it to another mom & of course I started to cry.  I mean, yesterday he was going into 1st grade to be a Hooper Trooper & now he was in high school and time was blowin' and goin'.  Time continued to speed up as each year passed, and he left the nest, and hasn't looked back since. Then Harry hits high school; a few years later Hop graduates.  Harry is a senior (I really thi...

Today I was reading a few posts on Facebook.  Yes, I still get on it.  Yes, I like it, a lot.  I'm also my daughter's secretary & administrative assistant, so I have to get on to update her business page.  :)  There has been some chatter about cell phones and social media on Facebook the last few days. ESPN did a story about Madison Holleran , a U of Penn runner that committed suicide.  Everyone was shocked because on her Instagram page she looked so happy.  Hey everyone, news flash here, most people only let you see their "good side" on social media.  Do I post pics of myself or my fam looking bad?  Of course I don't.  (well, except when I posted one of Henry getting his braces & he had that mouth thing in, but it was hilarious!)  Do I want people to think I've got it all together all the time?  Of course I do!  For those of you who already didn't know, social media is not real life.  For those who post sel...

This is going to be short & sweet b/c it's April, and it's lacrosse season, and I have about a million and one things that have to be done tonight.  Know I have lots of postings rolling around in my head, but not enough hours in the day to sit down and spit them out. :)  With all that & a graduating senior that is just the way it is. Here are a few big things: 1st ~ So proud of my alma mater & my kids' high school!  They raised over $250K for Relay for Life.  That's over a quarter of a million dollars y'all!  Since both of my parents died from different forms of cancer, I'm super excited about how this money will be used for research.  Speaking of research, if you haven't seen the new immuno- treatment breakthroughs for certain kinds of brain tumors & skin cancer, google them.  Exciting things for sure.    2nd ~ I met an amazing young mom of three that has tested positive for the Alzheimer's Dominantly Inherited Gene...

My children consider me a commanding officer of the grammar police.  If you misuse a pronoun, a preposition, articles in front of words, a double negative or even a direct object, be prepared to be:  1st, corrected and 2nd,  judged.  Living in the deep south, we are already judged because of our accents, so if you add improper grammar on top of the accent...oy vey!  Yeah, I police mine pretty closely.     I was subbing for Elizabeth's English class & noticed a cute book in her teacher's room titled:   I judge you when you use poor grammar.   The first thing it made me do was giggle, because, yeah, I do judge people (right, wrong or otherwise) who use poor grammar.  I realize that you may be a member of Mensa, but if you are not using correct grammar, I will assume that you are uneducated.  Now, don't get me wrong, I am not perfect, but at least I try to not sound like a country bumpkin.  And, I really want this book. ...

As all moms know, December is CrAzY!  Not only is there the regular schedule to keep up with, but you have added in the seasonal schedule: decorating, cooking, Christmas cards, gift buying & wrapping ~ to just name a few.  Christmas is supposed to be the most wonderful time of the year, but instead it turns into the most dreaded & miserable time of the year. Ask me how many people I've heard complain about their extended families & having to spend time with them.  Ask me how I felt last night at the Galleria.  You know what, I felt sad.  I saw unhappy people trying to find gifts for people they don't really like with money they probably don't have.  The whole season gets kicked off with Black Friday which has turned into something ugly & selfish.  I don't want to be that way at Christmas.  I want to feel the love of my family.  I want to laugh and make happy memories.  I want to lavish in the simplicity of the king wh...

My children are pyromaniacs, but then again, aren't most children?  Mine come by it naturally.  My sister & I used to stick our fingers in candles to play with the wax & Hopson used to set rice fields on fire after they had been harvested on his family's farm growing up.  (yeah, I know, Hopson wins...)  But, playing with candles has always been a fascination of mine.  I just can't help it. Our kitchen, which I spend most of my time in, smells like rotten pumpkins right now.  Yuck!  My centerpiece that was on my table had three pumpkins & I didn't know the bottom had become rotten until yesterday.  In case you've never smelled rotten pumpkins, it's gross.  I've scrubbed my kitchen down, but I still get whiffs of it every now & then.  Bleh!  Because of the smell, I picked up some fragrance spray that I like at the grocery store.  It has a nice fresh smell to it. When I brought it home, Henry discovered it ...

Holy Schomly...my daughter is an internet published photographer!  And not just by me on this blog or on her webpage ...see, I know what you're thinking.  :)  Now, don't get me wrong, I love to use her photography, but as her biggest fan & biggest critic, she really does have an eye. There are wonderfully talented people in my community.  Artists, artisans, home decorators, fashion consultants, writers, and the list keeps going.  It really is amazing as I stop and think about it.  There are many of them who use their talent, not only to make something more beautiful, but a chance to share about the One who gave them the talent.  It's pretty cool. One of those people is Buffy York.  Buffy started a very popular blog called The Style Gathering , and features a talented Godly friend, Laura DiFatta, as one of her guest writers.  How Elizabeth came to meet Buffy, and now be a photographer for her is, to me, a pretty cool story. This past...

BBQ the Bucs Big & Midge #1 on your plate & #1 in your heart Every  year to raise money for Relay for Life our local high school hosts a huge event called BBQ the Bucs.  (This is one of our big rivals.)  Teams sign up to compete in the category of their choice:  hamburgers, chicken or steak.  The competition is judged and winners are announced.  Who will be king of the grill?   This is the 2nd year that Harry has competed with his friend Anthony.  The name of their team is Big & Midge.  You understand the name when you see the picture of them together.  :)  Harry and Anthony have been friends, I think, since they were 2.  Old friends are special, and theirs has always been an easy going friendship.  We love Ant.   Last year Big & Midge came in 2nd.  Harry was not very happy with that.  He felt team Big & Midge deserved to win.  Since they didn't, those two redouble...