I Miss My Mommy

I have been Face Book stalking people's family pictures lately.  I'm currently throwing myself my own little pity party.  There are tons of multi-generational pictures, families having Easter egg hunts, enjoying dance recitals, and mother's day.  I am totally jealous.  I'm being serious in that I mean the little green monster has been raising her very ugly head.  I wonder what my life would have been like if my parents had not passed away at such a young age?  How would I be different?  I believe that wee are partially molded by our experiences, both the good and the bad.


There are days when I want to be the one who can complain to my friends that my mom likes to stick her nose in my business of raising my kids; and my dad has gone totally crazy in his older years.  I want to be the child again and have to go to my parents and drag all my kids along.  Would it be a total pain?  Yes.  Dragging four kids anywhere, and dealing with extended fam can be a pain, but I wish I had that pain.  I know my parents would love my kids, no I take that back, they would absolutely adore them.  And I know they do love them from heaven, but it's just different when they can tell you.

GiGi & Pop are great.  They wrote me the sweetest note for mother's day.  They always remember me.  I would love to spend some time, even if it was just for 5 minutes, with my mom and dad.  What words of wisdom would they pass on to my children?  What embarrassing stories would they tell of me?  My mom adored Hopson, (I think she liked him more than she did me) but my dad never met him.  What would he say about my husband, children and life?  See, I told you, pity party.

I have many many things that I am thankful for:  the fam., extended family, and wonderful friends.  But you know, time is the only thing that you can't get back once it's gone.  And that's really what I wish I had with my parents, just a little more time.  Time to love, time to laugh, and time just to be with each other.

Celebrating Life & a time to love,
~ashley

For all of you who have lost a family member this year, please know you have my heartfelt condolences.  I pray that our Father God surround you with His love and peace, it is the only thing that makes a difference.